By Rashim Nabanja
Putting together a list of people that you would like to attend your wedding isn’t a walk in the park. As easy as it may seem, you wouldn’t really know the despair that comes with it until you are in the actual moment itself.
When preparing these guest lists, couples usually feel like they owe everyone they know an invitation card and in the end, they may feel guilty whenever they tend to leave someone off the list.
However much you would like to invite everyone that comes to your mind, there are things that may limit you and cause you to think twice or maybe re-revise who to invite to your big day.
Here are some of them.
Your wedding budget is usually one of the things that will affect your ceremony entirely. This is because everything on your wedding list needs funding and the amount of money you are willing to invest in a particular activity will definitely affect its outcome.
In this case, when it comes to the wedding list, you need to invite people that fit in your expenditure estimations. If you invite people that you can’t cater for entirely, it may lead to a wrong turn of the entire event.
No one would wish for his or her guests to start complaining about sitting space or limited drinks and food. Remember, besides coming to witness your union as a couple, guests also expect to receive the treatment and comfort they deserve.
Shanice Namuli says she and her husband had agreed to invite just 100 people to their wedding because it is what they could afford however, as when they got to listing down the names, the numbers kept on increasing and eventually they got to 250, “Almost everyone wanted to bring a plus one, and we didn’t want to be rude by rejecting their request.”
Namuli says however much they tried to adjust, the actual wedding day turned out to be a disaster especially when it came to the food part.
“We had talked to the caterers and agreed that they would serve moderate food so that everyone could get a plate but in the end, it wasn’t possible, about 60 people missed.”
Namuli adds that this is one of her biggest regrets and she always wishes they stuck to the people they could afford so that everyone could enjoy to the maximum.
It is very important to critically check out the venue of your wedding and determine whether it will be able to accommodate the number of guests you are thinking of inviting.
According to Moses Mutumba, a wedding planner based in Kampala, if you have a specific venue in mind as a couple, it may affect your guest list in two ways. If the venue is too big compared to your guest list, you may end up inviting more people just to fill up the large space that you have hired because, fewer people will ruin the setup making it seem like people just didn’t want to attend your wedding, which is a bit unpleasing to the eye.
If the venue is too small compared to your guest list, you are likely to face the reality of scraping some people off the list whether you like it or not.
Mutumba therefore advises couples to always make sure that their guests will properly fit their choice of venue, “If you choose a large venue, make sure you invite enough people to fill it up and if you have a smaller venue in mind, don’t invite a lot of people that will end up creating an uncomfortable environment for each other.”
In simple terms, one can refer this to guilt. Usually, when a couple gets to the part of putting together a guest list, they feel the urge of inviting everyone they know.
A sense of guilt may start building up when they decide to leave some one off and eventually, they may end up adding them to the list.
Come to think of it, this isn’t a bad thing because you wanting to invite everyone you know means you care about them however, the problem comes when you can’t cater for them all.
Fewer guests are always easy to manage. The larger the number of guests, the harder it will be for you to meet their needs therefore as a couple, you need to seat down and make sure you have a strong justification for everyone you invite.
Your wedding isn’t an excuse to bring back every long lost acquaintance therefore you need to focus on people that matter to you currently.
According to Mutumba, couples need to learn to set rules for their weddings and also stick to them, “If you don’t want children at your wedding, make it clear to those you invite. If you don’t want people to bring plus-ones, make sure you spell it out in the invites you send to them.”
It is always important for you to let your loved ones know that they need to adjust when it comes to your big day and at least play by your rules for once.
Your partner’s friends
It is kind of hard to admit but usually, our partners tend to have friends or people they relate with that we are not fond of or don’t feel the need for them to attend such an important day of our lives.
However, if your partner’s side of the guest list consists of someone’s name you feel doesn’t need to be invited, don’t cross it out. Be ready to compromise. If the person is on the list, it means they play a special part in your partner’s life. Sharing a few hours with them wouldn’t hurt as long as it is going to make the love of your life happy.
On the other hand, eliminating a name that your partner included on the list may end up causing misunderstanding between the two of you which isn’t healthy in such a phase of your relationship. Your wedding preparation is enough stress already without such bickering. Plus, you wouldn’t want your partner to consider you as a selfish person.
Always remember, your guest list will have a great impact on the outcome of your event. It could be through the number or the kind of people on it. Whichever the case, always have an open mind when putting it together. This is the only way you will make the right decisions concerning it.