{"id":12722,"date":"2019-07-05T12:27:58","date_gmt":"2019-07-05T09:27:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/?p=12722"},"modified":"2019-07-05T15:20:43","modified_gmt":"2019-07-05T12:20:43","slug":"when-is-the-best-time-to-have-children-after-marriage","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/?p=12722","title":{"rendered":"When is the best time to have children after marriage?"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Joan Salmon<\/strong><\/p>\n

Amazing how we plan to get married but never touch some of the issues that we will encounter. During courtship, my husband and I touched several ideas but we seemed to glide over them without a concrete plan. I guess all that mattered at that time was that I was finally getting married to the man of my dreams. Granted, we wanted children but while my husband wanted us to wait, I was on shaky ground. In the end, we conceived before he was ready and had our first child, a few months after our first anniversary. For most women, the narrative is quite different from mine with many wanting to wait before they start conceiving.<\/p>\n

Shantal Omara has been married for three years. She was certain she had wanted to have children after two years or so in marriage but things played out differently. \u201cI got pregnant six months into our marriage after my husband started nagging me. The pressure was too much, I just let him have his way. However, I had thought we would have had some time to have fun and warm up to marriage life. Something I believe would have brought us closer before adding to the family,\u201d she says with a far off look. While it might seem like water under the bridge, there are moments when Omara looks back to what would have been and the plans that were forfeited with sadness.\"\"<\/p>\n

Julius Kasibante believes the earlier the better, \u201cMy wife and I were on the same page of getting children early. Earlier than later is better because we still have the energy to run about, juggle life and make ends meet. Besides, it is better to grow with your children rather than be exhausted in old age, yet they need a more active person. Children at an older age, sometimes tend to be burdensome, more so if you retire and they still need your support,\u201d he smiled.<\/p>\n

Christine Ahabwe is thankful that all turned out well regarding children. \u201cWhile I had wanted them a little earlier, my husband believed that we needed some time for ourselves as a couple. At first, it did not make sense but he took time to share his ideas and I am forever thankful for that.\u201d The couple enjoyed parties, get-togethers, and me-time and by the time they conceived, three years down the road, they had made memories that mattered. \u201cWe had also made investments and built our house so we would raise our family in our own place rather than a rental. I am glad that we took that path,\u201d she says with a smile.\"\"<\/p>\n

Evelyn C Kharono Lufafa, a counselling psychologist\u00a0at Talk TheRapy Uganda, says, \u201cChildren are a blessing from God as the Christian adage goes. However, it is good for a couple to agree, especially during courtship on when to start having children.\u201d Lufafa says when this is dealt with early it is easier and sets a good foundation for the couple to talk freely about the same. She adds that when to start having children is entirely up to the couple to decide, \u201cAs a counsellor, my take would be for a couple to start having children one or two years after getting married to allow the two to bond well before they start having children other than having them immediately after marriage.\u201d<\/p>\n

Generally speaking, the ideal time to talk about when to have children or if you will have any, at all, would be during courtship as this allows for mutual agreement on several issues that may affect your future together.<\/p>\n

What a couple should think about if they plan to have children immediately after the wedding.\"\"<\/strong><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/strong>Ask yourselves the following questions prior to marriage to help you set the right environment for your child.<\/p>\n