{"id":16678,"date":"2021-02-01T14:04:31","date_gmt":"2021-02-01T11:04:31","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/?p=16678"},"modified":"2021-02-03T13:09:54","modified_gmt":"2021-02-03T10:09:54","slug":"when-his-mother-does-not-like-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/?p=16678","title":{"rendered":"When family doesn’t like your partner: ”We got married against the odds”"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Promise Twinamukye<\/strong><\/p>\n

Through their mutual friend Solome, Frasse Xavier Musoke, a microfinance consultant found a soul mate in Rose Nakate. In September 2020, Solome had given Rose\u2019s phone contact to Frasse. After three and a half weeks, Rose gave in to the request of meeting Frasse at his home in Kajjansi for a prayer meeting.\"\"<\/p>\n

The meeting was going just fine until Frasse\u2019s mother got unsettled about the couple’s friendship. Tempers flared and she called Rose all sorts of names. This escalated when she involved her son in the ugly scene.<\/p>\n

Frasse was not the type that took any woman to his parents\u2019 home. In case he did, he would have to be serious, a thing his mother sensed too.<\/p>\n

\u201cMum thought Rose was targeting my property and was afraid I would never be obedient to her again,\u201d Musoke said, explaining that he is the only child to his mother, which could explain her insecurity about another woman being in his life.<\/p>\n

It was Rose\u2019s first time to meet Frasse, later on, his parents. She says she felt like she had wasted her time staying chaste only to get a cold welcome. However, she is grateful that Frasse defended her.<\/p>\n

\u201cAfter 14 years of prayer for marriage, I did not think God had prepared me for such a relationship,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

Rose says she did not walk away because not everyone was against their relationship. His aunts, uncles and Solome kept comforting her that things would get better.<\/p>\n

One problem remained, Frasse’s mother did not come around even after the couple had dated for some time. There is a time when Rose contemplated calling it quits but talked to one of the priests she had known from childhood. The priest advised against any hasty decision.\"\"<\/p>\n

\u201cThat man must love you so much to face his parents. If you feel something for him, don\u2019t let him down. Pray over it and God will show you the way,” the priest advised.<\/p>\n

Rose grew fonder of Frasse as he supported her through all the unfortunate times. She stayed until, choosing to support him too until it was over.<\/p>\n

\u201cAll the accusations did not matter anymore. We kept praying and going for counselling,\u201d she said.<\/p>\n

The proposal<\/strong>
\nThe two continued getting to know each other more. Rose who grew up in the home of catholic priests introduced Frasse to them. She realised that one of the priests was Frasse\u2019s great uncle which made matters lighter. They spent time saying novenas ( catholic recital prayers) of all sorts.<\/p>\n

One day, on their way from St Jean Mary Muzeeyi Shrine on Rubaga Road where they had gone for prayers, something crossed Frasse\u2019s mind, \u201cWith all kindness and humility, I beg you to be my wife,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

Rose, still unsure of herself, just smiled and said, \u201cIf God wills.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"\"
\nFrasse was very excited that he drove in the wrong lane and the traffic officers stopped him.
\n\u201cI started thinking about our introduction and the wedding because I wanted us to be together in Christ as soon as possible,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

The introduction<\/strong>
\nDuring introduction meetings, the couple agreed not to alert Frasse\u2019s mother, who was still against their relationship. They set their wedding for December 4, 2020, which would be a day after their introduction.<\/p>\n

To raise the much-needed funds, Frasse sold one of his assets,\u201cWe wanted to stay together and have the Holy Communion,\u201d he said.<\/p>\n

The invitations were sent only to a handful of people but one can never be too careful. Soon, most people including the groom’s mother would learn about it.\"\"<\/p>\n

On the day of the introduction, everything at Rose’s home was in place except the groom and his escorts. Frasse’s journey had been delayed by his mother’s hysterics about the introduction.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe arrived late and we missed most of our rituals,\u201d Rose says.
\nThe bride then planned on postponing the wedding day but her close-knit circle did not allow her to do so.<\/p>\n

The wedding<\/strong>
\nEveryone dreams of a happy fairytale-like wedding, and this couple was no different. Their expected bliss was however interrupted by a series of unfortunate events.\u00a0 The bride\u2019s phones, their rings and the pageboy\u2019s suit for their wedding day went missing.<\/p>\n

God was merciful and they able to recover the pageboy’s suit and one of the bride’s phones at the wedding.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

More unfortunate news<\/strong><\/p>\n

The bishop who was going to wed them was hospitalised and on the day of the wedding due to COVID-19, a family of six who were to the wedding got an accident and were hospitalised, The bride her brother (a person they had grown up within the priest’s home),\u00a0 a priest, one of those that groomed her got an accident, three priests and two nun, all part of the people who raised her fell ill, among other things.<\/p>\n

Her make-up was redone because she kept crying. They reached the Uganda Martyrs Shrine in Munyonyo at 2 pm instead of midday.<\/p>\n

Fr Joseph Kaseeta of Naguru Parish and Fr John Bosco Masengere, wedded them.<\/p>\n

\"\"
\n\u201cApart from misplacing my shirt, I made it to the church in time but had to wait for my bride for two hours. Rose entered church looking pensive,\u201d Frasse recollects, noting that nonetheless, she felt relieved as soon as they handed her over to him.<\/p>\n

The groom was overjoyed that Rose\u2019s family had trusted him with their daughter while Rose loved the songs sang at the party.
\n\u201cThe homily gave me hope that I regained strength,\u201d she says, thanking her matron for encouraging her before and during the wedding.\"\"<\/p>\n

\u201cBy the time we went to the reception, I was upbeat.\u201d
\nThe reception heightened her spirit.<\/p>\n

\u201cAt the reception venue, guests cheered us!\u201d she says, adding that seeing more than 80 people yet they had invited only 50 excited her.\"\"
\nThe food and drinks were great too but the cake and decoration did not match their bargain.<\/p>\n

Advice to people<\/strong><\/p>\n

According to the couple, no matter what people say, the couple\u2019s decision is the only thing that can shape its fate.<\/p>\n

\u201cCommunication is paramount to resolve conflicts and for that to happen, there has to be trust between us,\u201d Nakate said.\"\"<\/p>\n

Talking and being honest to each other helped them reach the wedding day although the road was rocky.<\/p>\n

Much as there will be opposition before marriage and more after marriage, Musoke says anchoring yourself on God will ease the burden.<\/p>\n

Because they kept praying and attending different prayer meetings, they were able to overcome all that storm.<\/p>\n

According to Musoke, a God-fearing partner will always have conscience in whatever they do. The reason one should aim for the character of a person over beauty in a relationship, although he says he got both.<\/p>\n

\u201cEven when they are extremely agitated, whatever they do will have a bit of shyness for God and remorse. They will always think of a righteous path to take on certain issues,\u201d he said.\"\"<\/p>\n

After the wedding<\/strong><\/p>\n

According to Evelyn Connie Kharono, a counselling psychologist, love conquers all blemishes. But what happens later when all is said and done and reality hits?<\/p>\n

Connie says<\/p>\n

All is well and good until the blame game starts… “Some events remain traumatic to the person they happened to.”<\/p>\n

She advises that seeking early intervention through a counsellor will help unbury all the emotions in the early stages so that they don’t keep popping up in the later stages of marriage.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe lady needs counselling on her own and the man too, then as a couple. This will help lessen the trauma they may have got from all the things they went through,\u201d Connie said.<\/p>\n

However, the people in question need to do this willingly to quicken the healing process.<\/p>\n

Tit bits<\/strong>
\nGroom: Frasse Musoke Xavier, microfinance consultant
\nBride: Rose Nakate, businesswoman
\nChurch: Munyonyo Uganda Martyrs Shrine
\nReception: Sheraton Hotel, Kampala
\nDecoration: Hellen and Rachael
\nDressing: Kushona fashion designers
\nPhotography: Kush events
\nBudget: Shs25m<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Promise Twinamukye Through their mutual friend Solome, Frasse Xavier Musoke, a microfinance consultant found a soul mate in Rose Nakate. In September 2020, Solome had given Rose\u2019s phone contact to Frasse. After three and a half weeks, Rose gave in to the request of meeting Frasse at his home in Kajjansi for a prayer […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":16695,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jnews-multi-image_gallery":[],"jnews_single_post":{"source_name":"","source_url":"","via_name":"","via_url":"","override_template":"0","override":[{"template":"1","single_blog_custom":"","parallax":"1","fullscreen":"1","layout":"right-sidebar","sidebar":"default-sidebar","second_sidebar":"default-sidebar","sticky_sidebar":"1","share_position":"top","share_float_style":"share-monocrhome","show_share_counter":"1","show_view_counter":"1","show_featured":"1","show_post_meta":"1","show_post_author":"1","show_post_author_image":"1","show_post_date":"1","post_date_format":"default","post_date_format_custom":"Y\/m\/d","show_post_category":"1","show_post_reading_time":"0","post_reading_time_wpm":"300","show_zoom_button":"0","zoom_button_out_step":"2","zoom_button_in_step":"3","show_post_tag":"1","show_prev_next_post":"1","show_popup_post":"1","number_popup_post":"1","show_author_box":"0","show_post_related":"0","show_inline_post_related":"0"}],"override_image_size":"0","image_override":[{"single_post_thumbnail_size":"crop-500","single_post_gallery_size":"crop-500"}],"trending_post":"0","trending_post_position":"meta","trending_post_label":"Trending","sponsored_post":"0","sponsored_post_label":"Sponsored by","sponsored_post_name":"","sponsored_post_url":"","sponsored_post_logo_enable":"0","sponsored_post_logo":"","sponsored_post_desc":""},"jnews_primary_category":{"id":""},"footnotes":""},"categories":[524],"tags":[],"ppma_author":[1784],"class_list":["post-16678","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-real-stories"],"authors":[{"term_id":1784,"user_id":1,"is_guest":0,"slug":"weddingadmin","display_name":"weddingadmin","avatar_url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/cd3996c46efafdc40969010bfd78c8e4dda9d99318e7dd6403983ea0dadbcfce?s=96&d=mm&r=g","author_category":"","first_name":"","last_name":"","user_url":"","job_title":"","description":""}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16678","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=16678"}],"version-history":[{"count":10,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16678\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":16730,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16678\/revisions\/16730"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/16695"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=16678"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=16678"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=16678"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.mywedding.co.ug\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fppma_author&post=16678"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}