Many people at the start of their wedding preparations have no idea how much of a task awaits them. It seems that a wedding is just a matter of choosing a restaurant, contractors, and buying a dress and suit. And when there are more tasks, the stress level rises and there is a chance of burnout and preparation fatigue.
So what do you do if you do get tired and feel like nothing wants to happen anymore, the floral choices don’t bring the same joy, and the only thing you want to do is to play at an online casino Uganda or watch YouTube?
Why Are You Tired?
For starters, you should allow yourself to be tired. It’s normal. You’re organizing a multi-component project, stressing, worrying, making a huge number of decisions at once, micromanaging, controlling the budget, choosing the team. It’s a lot of pressure.
The last thing you need to do now is start berating yourself or your partner for burnout. So, let’s start by accepting your condition as normal, hearing yourself and being willing to take care of yourself. That way it will be easier to
cope.First Steps on How to Cope
Now that you are not berating yourself for your condition, you can look for the causes of burnout. They can be different.
Are you tired of the advice of your relatives? Feeling like there’s more to do than you have time to prepare? Tired of only discussing the wedding? Feeling like you’re taking care of everyone at the same time: guests, parents, contractors? Feeling like you’re not getting anything done or you’re not on budget? Or do you have varying degrees of interest and involvement in the preparations?
Perhaps it takes most of your energy to explain to your guests why you chose this particular wedding format. Even budgeting and timing are not as difficult for you as negotiating with your guests or relatives. Try to identify what is taking all of your energy and try to address that issue first.
The solutions for each situation are different: talk to your family, talk to each other, take some time off from work, take your mind off the preparation, ask someone on the team one more time that everything is under control. And sometimes just buying a dress will work.
Assess your schedule. Everyone has a different comfortable pace of preparation. If you don’t rest every day when you come home from work and immediately sit down to prepare, there’s a better chance that you’ll burn out.
Evaluate your to-do list. In a few months your to-do list may have become a chaos of folders, screenshots and chats. Systematize them anew, and it will become calmer. You may have burnout just from feeling chaotic.
Shift your attention from worrying about the future to what’s in your zone of influence right now. You have to choose a photographer now, don’t think about the other one, just turn on one-tasking.
Set aside certain times of the day to deal with unpleasant and difficult issues. Most often in the first half of the day we have more energy. Leave the evening to each other.
Allow yourself to rest. Just stop planning, counting, rearranging everything. It makes no sense that by the wedding day you come in so tired that you can’t enjoy it, but everything will be perfect.
Take responsibility for anything and everything. A wedding is not an exam, your guests are not an admissions committee.
Praise yourself for everything you’ve already done. That’s a huge way to go! Praise yourself and each other for even small decisions.
Switch to another task. Perhaps you’re tired of menu planning. Take a break and think about what you would enjoy doing right now? How about an extra dance with your fiancé?
Think maybe you have some misunderstandings with your team? Talk to them, eliminate that background source of stress.
Stop comparing your wedding to someone else and listening to other people’s advice. It’s a huge source of stress that’s definitely not helping you right now. Your wedding is unique, you make it the way you want it.
The Magic Pill
Actually, time out and pleasant rituals for yourself and your partner work best. Go on a date, go for a walk, have a spa day, give each other a massage, meet with friends, go out of town, go to an exhibition or theater, and maybe just sleep or play sports. Distractions from preparation are possible and necessary.
Often the wedding takes so much time that there is no time left for pleasant and enjoyable activities. And without them, you lose resources and strength. Don’t eliminate from your life the things that make you happy. If you’re tired, that’s a signal that it’s time to do something else. Make an overall list of enjoyable activities and do items from it each week.
Forget about preparation and get distracted. Allow yourself to rest and not discuss preparation, so you’re more likely to regain interest in doing it.